Hello My Name Is...

"Now you are my friends, since I have told you everything the Father told me."
John 15:15b NLT

“Abraham believed God and was set right with God,” includes his action. It’s that mesh of believing and acting that got Abraham named “God’s friend.” James 2:23b MSG

What is your name? That's easy to answer. But then, what are names you wear in life? What are the names you call yourself or that others have called you? Do any of these sound familiar?

Defeated, divorced, molested...
Angry, alone, addicted...
Ugly, obese, anorexic...
Cancer survivor, arthritis patient, learning disabled...

Let's rethink this. Here is what the Bible says.

Redeemed, set free, victorious...
Child of God, Friend of Jesus, Beloved of God...
Justified, righteous, blameless...
Accepted, empowered, a new creation...

And so much more!

I don't want to be known as a cancer patient or survivor without being known as God's child. Cancer is just a small portion of my life. I am a daughter, sister, wife, mother, friend.

We need to recall the words the Bible states about us and also speak those things over the people around us.

I like how this song by Michael West puts it:

"...Hello, my name is regret
I’m pretty sure we have met
Every single day of your life
I’m the whisper inside
That won’t let you forget

Hello, my name is Defeat
I know you recognize me
Just when you think you can win
I’ll drag you right back down again
‘Til you’ve lost all belief

Oh, these are the voices. Oh, these are the lies
And I have believed them for the very last time

Hello, my name is child of the one true King
I’ve been saved, I’ve been changed, I have been set free
"Amazing Grace" is the song I sing
Hello, my name is child of the one true King...

I am no longer defined
By all the wreckage behind
The one who makes all things new
Has proven it’s true
Just take a look at my life

Hello, my name is child of the one true King
I've been saved, I've been changed, I have been set free
"Amazing Grace" is the song I sing
Hello, my name is child of the one true King...

What love the Father has lavished upon us that we should be called His children
I am a child of the one true King..."

Matthew West

c2013 Sparrow Records

You can watch the video here: http://is.gd/UCucqH

My prayer for you is that you would not allow yourself to be labeled by whatever negative experiences you have been through, or by anything you have done that you regret. Don't use any of those things as your name.  The name your parents gave you is what you should go by and then back it with the scriptures and what God says about you. For example, the verses I listed at the beginning of this post talk about how we are a friend of God. Just thinking about the fact that the God of the Universe eecalls you His friend and wants to have an intimate friendship with you will change how you view yourself! Start to speak the truth of who you are in Christ into your life. You can use what you have been through for His glory!

By: Beki Beane and Erica Faraone

Bear It All

"Bear (endure, carry) one another's burdens..." Galatians 6:2a AMP

"Laugh with your happy friends when they’re happy; share tears when they’re down." Romans 12:15 MSG

I am a better laugh than cry kind of girl. I have shed a few tears through this process. I have laughed a ton. There is nothing funny about cancer, but I have found humor along the way!

I have met a few people that are fighting cancer and are on a journey of their own with chemo regimens and surgeries. Chemo is different for everyone. There are different treatments for different types of cancers. How people tolerate their treatment is very different as well. Oh, and not everyone loses their hair!

I met a gal and we hit it off right away. We exchanged numbers and we are staying in contact. She is just beginning her chemo journey. She texted me last week and told me that she was cutting her hair short in preparation for it falling out. I felt like crying. It brought back the day I had my hair cut. I knew I would lose my hair and I thought it would be fine. It wasn't fine. It was hard. My hairdresser gifted me my hair cut and she cried and I held back the tears. One day my hair was shedding so bad, I called my husband and had him pick me up from work to shave my head. I thought I was prepared, but as he shaved my head I cried. It made the journey more real and I knew that now everyone would know. I sent my closest friends and family a picture so they would be prepared.

I now know what it feels like to actually want to take, carry, and endure another's burden. I don't want anyone to have to go through any of what I've had to go through. I want to be there for others in any way I am able. To laugh or cry with my friends.

My prayer for you, is that as you go through life's journeys that you would be mindful of others that are struggling as well. God wants us to bear each other's burdens as He carried, and daily carries, ours. God created us to do life together and be there for one another.

"Blessed be the Lord, who bears our burdens and carries us day by day, even the God who is our salvation!" Psalm 68:19 AMP

Amen!

When The Music Fades

"Sing to God, sing praises to his name; lift up a song to him who rides through the deserts; his name is the Lord; exult before him!" Psalm 68:4 ESV

At first it was overwhelming. The sheer volume. There were so many calls, texts, online messages and cards that came in almost daily. It was truly a blessing that so many people cared.

I know the outpouring was genuine, but it has subsided quite a bit. Now I mainly hear from people I see and then the few people that have been there all along that still check on me.

When the music fades or when things in life seem to quiet down with whatever you are going through, what do you do?

Well, with everything that I have been through in the past six months, I am going to choose to sing! Maybe not literally, but I will make His name known!

He is the one that rode with me through the desert! I want to be a light to those around me. I want others that are battling cancer, or having chemo to know there is hope. I want those that have an illness, are going through a divorce, or just can't shake feeling that the glass is half-empty to know that even if there aren't people in your life cheering you on, sending you cards, or checking up on you, the One that created you cares for you and loves you!

My prayer for you is that as the music fades you would "lift up a song to him who rides through the deserts" with you. He has been there all along so sing praise! Begin to focus on someone or something else. Ask God to put someone in your path that needs encouragement or help through her desert.

Oh Where Is My Hairbrush?!

"Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we’re in." Hebrews 12:2a MSG

I finished chemo today -- yes! The next step is one final surgery and I'm done!

My hair will begin to grow ... Although there's been a couple times that having no hair made me laugh. Like the other day when my co-worker offered to take care of some boxes of past years' data to "get them out of my hair." (But I have no hair--ha, ha! I think these things are funny.) Then, my daughter asked me if I had a brush in my purse... now why would I have that right now? More inside laughter! I find myself singing the Veggie Tales song, "Oh Where is My Hairbrush?"

But it will be nice for the process of restoration to begin. My hair will grow back, my scars will start to heal and the toxins will slowly leave my body.

I've had a few people ask, "What's next?" regarding scans, blood work, etc. I'm in a different place than some who have been on this journey. Because the cancer was caught early, because both were small tumors, and also because the cancer found in one of four lymph nodes was minuscule, I will not be eligible for scans. They will check my blood work on occasion, but there is no lab work for cancer. The blood draws will be mainly to check my other levels which may have been affected by chemo.

After my next and last surgery, my plan is to get fit and healthy so that I can run a 5k with a friend and also do the survivor walk for the cancer relay this year!

I was so excited to have my last chemo, but part of me wonders how well it worked, and I hope and pray that this preventative action of chemo treatments killed any and all bad cells that may have been wandering around my body. 

But I know that...

"My hope is in the name of the Lord
Where my help comes from
You're my strength, my song
My trust is in the name of the Lord
I will sing Your praise, You are faithful"

"My Hope" by Hillsong

So this is what I have ... a BIG God! Plus, faith, hope and freedom in the fact that I know He is right beside me, holding my hand during this journey and the ones to come! In faith, I believe that there is no cancer in my body and I will leave it at that. I will follow through with my treatment plan and doctors appointments and go from there.

My prayer for you as you go from one journey to another, is that you would run your race with your eyes on Jesus and that your heart and mind would be filled with hope! He will give you the strength you need for whatever journey you are facing. He is faithful!

Chemo ... All I NEVER wanted for Christmas

"Every good gift and every perfect (free, large, full) gift is from above; it comes down from the Father of all [that gives] light, in [the shining of] Whom there can be no variation [rising or setting] or shadow cast by His turning [as in an eclipse]," James1:17 AMP.

Well, this has been quite the ride! From diagnosis to surgery was two months to the day. Five weeks later was chemo treatment number one of four. Three weeks, then second chemo. I celebrated my 40th birthday, which was exactly two months after my surgery! Then came Thanksgiving, third chemo, and now it's Christmas! Whew!

As a kid growing up, I always had things I needed or wanted for Christmas. I can't think of anything I want or need this year. I don't have everything, but I'm content! I have an amazing family--husband, kids, brother, parents, and in-laws! I have a roof over my head, food to eat, friends, transportation, and the list goes on. Gifts from above!

The greatest gift I have is Jesus! He has been the best Friend I could ever ask for and a Dad when I needed Him most. He is my Provider, Comforter, Healer, and my ever present Help!

I would never wish cancer or chemo upon anyone. This last one wiped me out for a week (the one right before Christmas.) It's exhausting, but without it, disease could've had the opportunity to spread and if it wasn't caught, next Christmas could've been so different. I'm thankful that Jesus never changes and that there is no shadow, just light coming from Him.

My prayer for you this Christmas, is that you would allow Christ's light to shine in and through you; that you would know and understand His endless love for you. Wherever you are or whatever you are going through, stop for a minute and receive the greatest gift of all, Jesus!

If you would like to pray and receive Christ, just sincerely turn to God in this moment and say something like this:

"Dear Jesus, thank you for coming to earth as a baby. Thank you for growing up and dying on the cross for my sins. I admit I am a sinner and I need you to save me. I ask for your forgiveness and I receive it right now. Please wash away all my sins and make me clean. Please take over my life today. I'm giving it to you. I believe you are the Son of God, Jesus and that you rose from the dead. Thank you for the power of your Life that is now in me. Please come and live in my heart and fill me with your Spirit. Thank you, Lord, because I know you hear me and that I am changed from this moment on. Amen."

Click on this link for new believer resources and the answer to, "What to do now?": http://is.gd/DaiK2k

Pull Over the Struggle Bus

"We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance." Romans 5:3 NLT

Oh man, this third chemo is reeking havoc on my body. I haven't felt as well this time and it's super frustrating. I think I caught a little something as well. I'm so done with all this, except I have one last treatment on January 2nd. I just want off this bus.

I have learned a lot about cancer, treatments, nurses, friendship and more. In the midst of this, I have rejoiced with other people's good news and been there for their struggles. I have learned to endure. My adventure has not been in vain and although I wish it were over, I wouldn't trade the people I've met, the things I've learned, and the hope that I have for anything. "And this hope will not lead to disappointment." Romans 5:5 a NLT

I'm struggling right now as Christmas is upon us, my daughter's basketball season is in full swing, my son is home from college, and I still have work, etc. I want to feel great and keep on keeping on. I hate having to slow down.

For all of you that have asked how I'm doing and I say good and then you ask how I'm really doing, I have been telling you the truth. Honestly, up till now, I've been good, and now I've hit a small speed bump, but it's just a bump.

My prayer for you is that as you go speeding along life's road that you would take hold of the trials, develop endurance and take hold of hope! A life with Christ still has disappointments, BUT it is not disappointing!

Blessed Assurance

"For we live by believing and not by seeing." 2 Corinthians 5:7 NLT

"Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see." Hebrews 11:1 NLT

This reminds me of a hymn we used to sing in church.
Written by: Fanny Crosby in 1873

"Blessed assurance, Jesus is mine;
Oh, what a foretaste of glory divine!
Heir of salvation, purchase of God,
Born of His Spirit, washed in His blood.
This is my story, this is my song,
Praising my Savior all the day long.
This is my story, this is my song,
 Praising my Savior all the day long."

This is honestly the only thing we actually have. I had cancer in both breasts, and in one of four lymph nodes on the left side. I believe the cancer is all gone and the primary reason I am doing chemo is for re-assurance that if I had any other cancer in any other cells this chemo regimen I'm on will take care of it.

I went to my pre-chemo checkup and I asked the nurse practitioner if I would need any scans or blood tests to see if I had any other cancer or if I was cancer free. The good news is that my cancer was caught early, the bad news is that I don't qualify for scans. And blood tests would only reveal blood counts that may or may not be indications that something is wrong. I looked at her and said, "You are not giving me any warm fuzzies."

I can't see inside my body and I can't see what lies ahead nor can I see God. But I have faith. I've seen God at work, seen marriages restored, seen the sick healed, and I've seen youth come to the Lord. I believe, I have confidence, and assurance in the One who knows me, my story, and my body better than anyone.

My prayer for you, is as you walk through life that you would learn to dig deep. Get past your past; look in those dark spots and see where God was there and has been there all along. People remark about how strong and brave I've been. Well, I myself have had to dig deep, face things and make decisions. I've had some anxiety prior to surgery, but I've never been fearful because He is faithful!